Graduation and Traveling

Posted on by Analise

As I reflect on my medical school matriculation, it is tempting to consider myself and say, “good job, Lise. You did that. You are now a doctor because of your hard work and intelligence.”

However, I know that thinking this would be a disservice to God who I felt gave me the idea to attend medical school, to become a physician. He is the one who sustained me throughout my time in school. He is the one who is responsible for the wonderful friends I have made and the mentors that I was blessed to find. He helped me pass my exams and he is the one who helped me match. He is teaching me, a baby healer, how to be like Him, the Great Healer. I am nothing without Him.

Keeping this truth in mind, I feel incredibly grateful for the opportunity that medical school was. It was a beautiful journey of stretching my limitations and shifting my viewpoints. I learned much about medicine and the nature of humans. I have also internalized the fact that I have much more to learn.

Thank you to every single person who encouraged me and prayed for me. Thank you to my husband, who made sure that I remembered what was most important. Thank you to my mother, my original inspiration to become a physician and my very first mentor. Thank you to the rest of my family who kept tabs on how I was doing and feeling through it all. Thank you to my friends, who reminded me that there are also exciting things that happen outside of the hospital.

 

In other news, I spent most the two weeks before graduation on opposite sides of the country. I was in both Panama City Beach and in the Bay Area of California. I spent a grand total of half a day in JXN in those two weeks and I love it because traveling. Yes.

 

Panama City Beach

First, we went to Panama City Beach with some of our friends (basically crashing their vacation) and below are some of the activities I enjoyed the most. We had been here before on our honeymoon and it was really cool to see it during its active season. Restaurants and attractions are mostly closed during the winter and open up right before spring break.

 

Saltwater Grill

Even now, I can’t stop thinking about this restaurant! EVERYONE at the table finished their food and it was all so delicious. The service was amazing and although our waiter was relatively new, he was extremely knowledgeable and attentive.

I had the Shrimp and Scallop Penne a la Vodka, which was a manageable portion, especially for someone like me who has trouble with the incredibly large portions that restaurants expect you to finish. After I devoured my food, I realized I would have eaten the entire large portion because it was just that good.

I have plans to bring one of my uncles to this restaurant one day because I know he will just adore the food and the service here.

Sunset Cruise

This cruise was low stress and came with a complimentary drink. We lounged on the deck and watched dolphins play around in the water, all while listening to “island music”.

The sun setting over the ocean from this perspective was breathtaking and well worth the money we spent to check it out.

First Watch

THIS RIGHT HERE. This place has become one of my favorite breakfast spots. Rome and I got a chance to check this place out for breakfast while he was in Omaha, and when Rome likes a restaurant, we  go back multiple times. My favorite thing here is their freshly squeezed orange juice. I am not normally an orange juice fan, preferring apple as my juice of choice. However, I can’t exaggerate when I talk about how delicious and fresh this orange juice is. I have never tasted anything like it and I am going to be at every First Watch I can find, ordering this orange juice in a large and finishing off Rome’s if he isn’t quick enough. My mouth is watering just thinking about how delectable it is.  Their food also is very fresh, offering a variety of organic options for those who are interested.

 

 

San Francisco/ Mountainview/Bay Area

Just so you know and so that you don’t make the same mistakes as I did, I was THAT tourist. You know, that tourist who is from Mississippi and assumes that it is blazing hot summer everywhere. Even better, the one who doesn’t check the weather of wherever we are traveling to. More like, the one who checks the weather then completely ignores it because surely, it can’t really be that cold.

Yeah, I did that. San Francisco is cold, y’all. Anyway, on to the touristy stuff we did.

 

Ghirardelli Square

We checked this one out first. It is a former chocolate factory that was made into a shopping center filled with mostly confectionary items. There are restaurants and bakeries and various shops that will make you want to dash your diet to pieces.  You can smell the chocolate from a mile away. Your nose will lead you to tasty treats here. You also get your first view of the wharf from this square because San Fran is on a hill and has many hills within its hills. There’s no escaping the hills.

This is a view of Coit Memorial Tower from one of the streets.

Fisherman’s Wharf

This is totally a tourist area. We walked up and down the wharf a couple of times, which is mostly a street filled with seafood restaurants that may or may not have some good things to offer. Chowder in breadbowls was one of my most commonly seen menu items. There are also a couple of tourist stores in this area if you’re looking for an I <3 San Francisco shirt. There are literally tons of people just milling about down here going to all the restaurants. We had some really fresh seafood off of one of the street vendors down here and then later on we came back to check out In and Out Burger because you can’t go to California without going to In and Out.

From the wharf, you can get a great view of Alcatraz island, which hosts the now-closed famous prison surrounded by water.

 

Union Square

This area contains a beautiful monument (The Dewey Memorial)  in the center of a large shopping area. There is a mall a couple of blocks down from the monument and there are stores completely surrounding the place.

We went to Daily Grill close to the square for lunch and did a lot of window shopping and walking around in this area (I got my 20,000 steps this day). Rome has a story he likes to tell about the water I ordered at Daily Grill that was the most delicious water ever and costed 9 bucks. Lise Lise has accidental expensive taste.

San Francisco Zoo

Rome makes a point to go to zoos in almost every place we visit, if they have one. He likes to compare them to the D.C. zoo, which he grew up frequenting with his family. No zoo ever compares to the D.C. zoo for him, but he still gives other zoos a chance.

The San Francisco Zoo boasts graceful giraffes, zebras, lions, tigers, grizzly bears, African birds, an insect area, monkeys and chimpanzees. I think my favorite thing about this zoo was the Rainforest area. It is likely my favorite because we couldn’t find it and had to go on a scavenger hunt to find this area. When we got there, it was a pleasant 80 degrees inside the building (a respite from the windy, freezing zoo). The birds in this area are unrestrained for the most part and are close enough to touch. If I had any artistic ability whatsoever, I would have taken the time to sketch them and then I would have painted the vivid plumes adorning the birds I saw in this rainforest.

 

 

 

My most recent traveling adventure is not traveling at all but moving. I have officially moved to NJ and am trying my best to adult. I don’t know how my college classmates have been doing this for 4 years while I was still in school. I’m trying to be like you guys 😉

 

Talk to you soon!

Lise

 

 

 

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Premarital Counseling

Posted on by Analise

“And they lived happily ever after…”

“In a relationship, things must be 50/50.”

“Make sure that you have different checking accounts because most of your arguments come from who is paying the bills.”

“Oh, but the honeymoon phase is over after a year, then you get sick of them.”

When people found out that I was engaged/married, they wanted to give me all the advice in the world. Random people I didn’t know tried to give me so much “good” advice. This, combined with commonly believed American myths, like the first one that I listed caused fairy princesses, like myself, to feel like we should have certain… expectations for our marriage. Namely, I felt like my prince charming should sweep me off into some mythical sunset after my wedding and then… I don’t know, I just wanted the proverbial sunset and the pretty white horse, okay?

When I showed up to my first premarital session, I brought these fairytale fantasies with me. I practically floated into the room with woodland creatures and my shiny new fiancé because we were perfectly meant for each other. We were so in love that this was really just a formality, anyway. We were really just doing this because it was something that our mentors recommended and we hold them in high regard.

Things in my mind before counseling included all of the following ridiculous statements. Couples that are healthy don’t have fights, naturally, because that means that your marriage is failing. Couples that are compatible when they get married stay that way because they just effortlessly “fit” together.  I already knew that there is a “completion” that happens when you get married to your soulmate and you just finish each other’s sentences. You don’t have to think to understand each other because you just “get” it. Everything would just click into place on my wedding day because that clearly happens.

No. No. A million times no. The first 10 minutes of premarital counseling taught me that my beau and I had unrealistic expectations. We had bought into the lies that media and rom-coms taught us. My ideas were not consistent with a healthy and real marriage of the two sinful, broken, selfish people also known as Lise and Rome.

 

What is premarital counseling anyway?

Premarital counseling is a series of sessions with a married couple that can be conducted individually or even in a group setting. It allows a couple to evaluate their relationship honestly and openly. Its purpose is to prepare couples for marriage, utilizing the wisdom from a couple who has been there. Sometimes they go through a lesson guided by a book or they cover topics that are important for couples to talk about, like finances and baggage.

In my case, we were blessed to have mentors who have been married for 30+ years. One of them is a licensed marriage and family therapist and leads premarital and couple’s counseling amongst other things for a living (#blessed). We used the premarital book that she and her husband wrote together and we keep a copy of it because we refer to it all the time (I will have the link to it at the bottom of the page). We completed the semester-long course with another couple that we keep around because they know too many of our secrets. I’m only slightly joking about that one.

 

My boo and I are not having problems, why rock the boat?

Marriage is a different ball game. My hubby’s mentor likes to put it this way: You go to school for YEARS and you get trained for different jobs/ careers, especially if the task or job is particularly hard or requires some experience. Marriage is incredibly hard, why wouldn’t you want to learn as much about it as possible before jumping into it? Why would you think that this is any different than something important that you need to get trained for? Because Disney princesses, that’s why.

In other words, you will want to be prepared WHEN things come up, because they will. These things that come up can be a tool for strengthening your marriage and understanding your spouse better or they can be a source of constant conflict and a sore spot of hurt and pain.

 

It costs money! I don’t have money!

Indeed it does. It was an investment I was willing to make for my marriage because I wanted our relationship to be as strong as possible. Plus, I was willing to invest in my wedding, why not invest in my marriage? The wedding day doesn’t happen every day, in fact, it is only day 1 of a lifetime of being with this person and in this relationship. I wanted to invest in the other days so they could be just as beautiful as the first.

 

“Make sure that you have serious premarital counseling!” is the primary advice that I give couples that ask me questions who are newly engaged or even considering marriage. It helps so much with managing those unrealistic expectations, evaluating weaknesses in communication, teaching how to deal with conflict, and identifying baggage.

We refer to the concepts we learned in premarital counseling frequently because it helps us when we fight (Yes, Rome and I fight and it is good for us). I appreciated those candid talks so much and I know that Rome did too because these are some of the things he said about it.

“Premarital counseling allowed us to make an informed decision based on things we learned about each other and marriage. You got to see the ugliness of marriage beforehand to decide if you wanted to go through with it or not. It asks the questions you were too in love to ask and allows you to decide what things about your future spouse you can and can’t handle. It also gave us access to teachers who wanted to help us. It was the best thing we have done for our marriage.”

If you are reading this and saying that it’s too late for you because you are already married, never fear, there’s always hope if you are having problems or if you just want to do something that can ONLY strengthen your marriage. Marriage and family therapists do this for a living, even if you aren’t having any problems. I think it is so much better to be proactive and identify possible problems before they become very real problems. Therapists can be found everywhere and a simple google search for licensed marriage and family therapists should be a good start.

There are also retreats that you can attend, like Weekend to Remember, that provide the same therapy for married couples.

 

 

Love you guys! Enjoy your marriages!

Lise

 

 

Here is the link to the book that we used:

https://www.amazon.com/Preparing-Marriage-Dating-Death-Part/dp/0692378626/ref=sr_1_36?ie=UTF8&qid=1495205885&sr=8-36&keywords=preparing+for+marriage

4 Things I Wish I Had Done Before Starting Medical School

Posted on by Analise

Before I got to college, I knew that I wanted to become a doctor. I just wasn’t aware of all the time and effort it would take to complete this journey to MD.

Disclaimer about this post: I am going to forever keep it real with you guys. I am not afraid to share my failures in hopes that someone else can learn from them. I can’t pretend to be perfect.

I went to college with a goal in mind, but I didn’t attack my classes and my life in general as a future physician would. I pretended as if I didn’t already know my weaknesses (Hey Math, I’m looking at you). Flailing around and hoping for the best was my mode of operation because I was brilliant, right? Answer: no, Lise is not brilliant, and even if she was, I don’t know that it would have helped her.

 

Some things I wish I had done:

  1. Hit the ground running with my classes.

I was taking some of the hardest classes on campus, yet I thought I would be able to keep up with the same apathetic high school class work effort. I went to all my classes, but I didn’t go to them prepared. I wasn’t focused and I essentially went as if I was going to watch a rom-com. I did this every day for an entire semester! You would think I would have learned sometime in the middle that I needed to get my life, and quickly, but no.

I didn’t keep in mind that I was LEARNING a lot of this stuff for the first time. In high school, I was just memorizing facts that I knew would be on an exam. It came easily to me then, so I thought it would come easily to me this time around.

This was a completely different ball game. “You mean anything is fair game? Even if we didn’t talk about it in class? So you don’t have to use the questions that you gave us on the study guide? There is a book associated with this class?”, were all questions that went through my head as I drowned in my first semester. I learned later that all this information I was avoiding learning would be resurrected when I was studying for the MCAT.

Why is this even important, Analise? Because when these topics showed up again on the MCAT, I wasn’t prepared. As much as I hate to admit it, I should have been taking notes and learning like I wanted to be able to REVIEW (instead of truly learn it the first time) it to prepare for this exam.

 

  1. Focused MCAT prep.

I had MCAT prep classes, I did the studying. However, if I had studied for the MCAT as I have studied for STEP 1 and STEP 2, it would have made a huge difference in my score (Hindsight is always 20/20 right?). This just means that when I studied for the MCAT, that was supposed to be my job. I was supposed to set a schedule and have a plan, but that is not how it went. I was haphazardly studying here and there, getting distracted then coming back to it, and wasting time and then wondering where it went… and then I took the test. That is not how I succeed in life, I’ve learned.

I could have taken the time to delve deep into my studying and given myself the freedom to put everything else on hold for that short time. 

 

  1. Learned more about how I study best.

I knew that there was no way to simulate the situation that is medical school. I was told this many times before I started school, and now that I have almost finished school (Yay, 2 weeks away!), I completely agree. There is no reason to try and simulate it, nor do I think any simulation will be accurate.

However, I do think that having a plan when beginning matriculation is invaluable to success. This is especially important in the beginning when we learned so much, so fast. I simply didn’t have time to sit and think about how I was going to study. My study style changed when I went through the different classes and years, but the tried and true methods were good places to start.

The way that I studied for the MCAT was an excellent way to start off with studying.

 

  1. Organized my life.

I wish that I had taken organization seriously! After my first year in college, I realized that my same methods that I employed in high school would still work, I just needed to make fit my schedule more. I started doing them and didn’t look back. If I had employed these methods in my first year, I would have been less dazed and confused and more prepared.

 

Love you guys and hope this helps!

Lise

 

 

 

We Don’t Talk Anymore (Cause You’re in Med School)

Posted on by Analise

“You are always so busy!”

“How do you even have time to be here right now?”

“I feel like you are about to rush off somewhere to doctor on someone!”

These are just a few of the many quotes I got during my stint in medical school. Yes, medical students are extremely busy. We are always studying, learning how to be a doctor, or asleep.

The things that my friends, husband, or family members did to encourage me made me feel like a human again after all the studying. These are some of the things I loved.

Encouraging texts/calls. Even though I didn’t respond within normal-person timeframes, seeing these and knowing that my friends were thinking about me energized me to complete my next task. There are a number of rough days that I had that were made bearable by the kind and encouraging texts that I got from my friends (I guess this has to do with my Words of Affirmation love language). The texts contained scripture, encouraging words, or simple messages of love and changed the tone of my entire day.

Understanding if “something comes up”– I frequently tried to estimate when I would be leaving the hospital and was quickly reminded of why I was not a math major. I was COMPLETELY WRONG. I said things like, “Oh at 5 pm we can go grab coffee,” and then I wouldn’t leave the hospital till 9 pm because “something came up”. Real things would come up, too! If a patient was dying, I couldn’t just say, “Oh you guys got this? I have a coffee date with someone, see you tomorrow!”

This one really bothered me because I valued the time that I got to spend with my friends/family and it was sad when I had to cancel plans with them. Because of the wonderful friends I have, they were understanding and we would just take a raincheck.

Coming with me to random medical school functions that have nothing to do with you. I wanted to take part in everything that my medical school had to offer, so I had to attend at least SOME of the parties for students. My husband was a champion for this one. He was at EVERYTHING. He loved being there and was always engaged. This meant the world to me and was another way for us to spend quality time together.

Make adjustments to align our schedules. Once my friends got the hang of what the medical students were doing and when, we worked our schedules accordingly to fit each other in. For instance, on some rotations, lunch is from 12-1. Rome would sometimes come and pick me up from the hospital as soon as I was released for lunch and we would go somewhere and spend time with each other and eat. Another time, during my preclinical years, a friend of mine came up to the hospital and we grabbed some food in the hospital. We adjusted our schedules so we could meet up and spend some time catching up with each other.

 

Honestly, if you are taking the time to read this post and think through how best you can support and be there for your friend/significant other during a time that is arguably the hardest in their life, you are already a step in the right direction. Anything you do from here will be greatly appreciated by them, even if they don’t verbalize it.
Love you guys!

Lise

 

 

Encouraging My Husband

Posted on by Analise

 

Rome’s shoulders were slumped. He held his face in his hands as he berated himself about the mistake he just made. He couldn’t believe that he was so careless and let something like this happen. Rome, my guy, was devastated.

When I see him in these moods, my heart breaks for him. I want to fix it immediately so we can go back to being goofy and full of laughter. This is the part where I take off every other hat I have in my arsenal and put on the hat of his helper. It is one of the wife-roles that I love because it makes me feel like I am empowered specially by Holy Spirit to help my guy. This is one of the things God MADE me to do.

 

These are some of the things that I do as my husband’s help-meet, his girl, and his friend to encourage him.

I pray deep intercessory prayers for him.

I love going to the Lord about my man. God and I want the same thing for him (ie- I want whatever God wants for him). When I am praying about him, I feel like God is just saying, “You know, I was thinking the same thing, Lise!” Plus, I love seeing God answer my prayers that I don’t tell Rome about. God just drops things in my guy’s mind and he thinks he came up with it, but really, it is God’s way of saying to me that he heard me and he is speaking to Rome about what I am telling him about.

I remind him of scripture.

This comes easily to me because I remind myself of scripture ALL THE TIME when I need encouragement. The word is one of the greatest tools that a wife has in her belt to encourage her hubby. I love putting the specific verses on notecards and leaving them on his desk or his computer because it lets him know I was thinking about him and thinking of verses that might be helpful to him.

I show him that I am his cheerleader.

I am Rome’s number 1 fan! Seeing my husband being beat up by the world is another reason to remind him that in my eyes, he is chosen, loved by God, special, capable, etc. I have learned that he needs to hear it from me! Instead of dwelling on the bad and reminding him of the bad things all the time, I try to give him some compliments on things I know he is trying to work on.

Example: Honey, you have been doing an excellent job with protecting me and our home. I can’t tell you how much I love that. 😉

I make his day easier.

When Rome is under a lot of stress, I can see him getting overwhelmed by all of his responsibilities and commitments. He simply can’t be superman all the time. So, I help him out and bear the burdens with him.

A simple, “Honey, how can I help you with all the things you are doing?”  works wonders and makes him feel like he can manage things a little better.

 

 

These things are simple and sometimes take just a couple of minutes to do. I didn’t realize how much a kind and encouraging word meant until I started being intentional about encouraging him.

 

Verses for Reference

Genesis 2:18 The LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”

 

Love you guys!

Lise

Writing in My Bible

Posted on by Analise

I am a book destroyer- no, really. I love feeling like my non-fiction and my books for school have been used up and that all their knowledge has been imparted to me in some way. I am the same way, if not more so, with the Bible.

I began scribbling in my bible when I started participating in Good Morning Girls on WomenLivingWell.org. This program was just what I was looking for at the time because I wanted to make a habit of reading my word every single day. Daily quiet time is what worked best for me and it really set up my day to focus on God for the rest of the day. More about how I do my quiet time can be found here.

This is how I write in my Bible.

Continue reading “Writing in My Bible” →

Personal Quiet Time

Posted on by Analise

I am my best self in the mornings. I get more done, I am more focused, and I just love the feeling that I have an entire day ahead of me. When I first started, it seemed like a natural fit for me to do my devotional time/quiet time in the mornings for this reason. I wanted to give God my best self, and I am simply not my best self after 5 pm.

These are the things that I do every morning that set the tone for the rest of my day. Doing this gives me encouragement to draw from all day long. It also gives me a scripture on my heart that I can share with someone who may need it. I love the way I am doing bible study right now, but it is not a rigid regimen. If I feel like I want to focus on prayer alone one morning, I do it. If I feel like I just want to focus on reading the word, I do that instead. Why not?

Here is what I am currently doing.

Continue reading “Personal Quiet Time” →

Smell Beautiful

Posted on by Analise

Shortly after getting married, I realized that I would have to be very selective in who I allowed myself to get advice from. There were all kinds of people that latched on to me because I was young and married. I know that they meant well and wanted me to avoid the mistakes they made, but they tried to give me all kinds of foolish advice. If I listened to what EVERYONE was telling me to do in my relationship, I don’t even know where we would be. My hubby feels the same way about a lot of the advice he has received.

Continue reading “Smell Beautiful” →

Match Week

Posted on by Analise

Every year in March, type A personalities all over the country find out where they are going to be spending the next 3-7 years of their lives. To say that this month is filled with tension, anxiety, and excitement is not quite wrong, but incomplete. It is more accurate to say that this month is all of the excitement from an entire year bottled up and being shaken to Coke+Mentos proportions.

This is the story of my experience.

Continue reading “Match Week” →

Interval Running

Posted on by Analise

I first started running when my mother and I were training for a marathon together. Oh yeah, that happened.

I was new to running in general (I only ran when bears chased me) and we both decided that interval running would be the best option for us.  We did the entire 26.2 miles in intervals!

This method has shown to help you continue to burn calories for the rest of the day. It also can help you increase your stamina and keep you from falling asleep from sheer boredom. Maybe it’s just me, but when I am bored on the treadmill, I feel like I am dying much faster than usual. I suddenly feel like running wasn’t such a good idea, that my legs are falling off, and that I can’t possibly breathe while I am dying a slow painful death.

Continue reading “Interval Running” →